WHO THE FUCK IS AWEN NULL?

An appeal to the public, sort of

We don’t know who they are either.

That’s the point.

Sightings range from a hooded figure outside a Cardiff newsagent to a shadow loitering in the window of a Boss shop, apparently doing some normal shopping like the rest of us mortals. One reader sent in a discarded wrap (featured image) clearly made from one of our own Athens ZineGlitch issues (good to see innovative recycling from our Greek brothers and sisters) with their (possible) face on it. We didn’t ask how they got it. We’re not going to. We’re just surprised the spaniels at UK customs missed it.

Send us your evidence. Blurry doorstep snaps. Polaroids you’re 80% sure are them. Anything printed, scrawled, or stickered to a lamppost. No biometric verification will be offered, attempted, or believed or is even available. Submit anyway.

Our panel of prestige faceless judges will rank entries on credibility, audacity, and general menace. The single most convincing submission will be forwarded to Private Eye for yet another formal rejection, which will be added to the collage in reception (Cardiff HQ).

We also asked an academic for comment. Professor Idris Carreg-Llwyd, [former] Chair of Applied Anonymity Studies at a university offered this:

“The central category error is assuming a face is a fixed referent rather than a consensus hallucination updated by witnesses after the fact. A reconstruction isn’t a face — it’s an inevitably flawed recollection. Frankly, the Null has done nothing more radically cunty than refuse to participate in everyone else’s memory error.”

We have no further questions for the Professor. He didn’t either, apparently.

Send sightings to foundthem@whothefuckisawennull.cymru — subject line: Who the Fuck is Awen Null?

The July edition of Awen Null is out…1st July 2026.